do you know that monkey can get drunk like humanbeing


As their carefree masturbation and poop throwing might indicate, monkeys have a naturally relaxed outlook on life. It's no surprise then that they put all but the most boner-inducing members of the human race to shame when it comes to getting drunk for free. In places like St. Kitts, alcoholic monkeys set up shop on the beach near bars and wait for unsuspecting lightweight tourists to just leave their cocktails lying around. The result is you paying $5 for a drink that just got a spider monkey shitfaced. Our male readers may point out that female humans have been known to posses this gift. Of course, they're missing the horrifying price those females have to pay: Rejecting their drunken advances, playing roofie roulette and occasionally waking up next to their drunk asses. Meanwhile, the monkey whose drink you just bought probably got laid too, on your dime.


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